You are reaching for something.
Closing a cupboard.
Halfway through a conversation you did not finish.
A quiet second between actions, the sort you hardly register because nothing is demanding your attention.
Then the message arrives.
“Can we talk.”
The room stays the same.
Inside, something does not.
The shift lands before the thought does, as if the body reacts to the idea of trouble long before the mind has a chance to make sense of anything.
A tightening in the chest.
A quick stomach drop.
The kind the body performs without checking if it is necessary first.
The mind starts rifling through drawers, pulling open whatever it can reach with no sense of order.
Did I forget something.
Did I miss a message.
Was I strange earlier without noticing it.
Is this about work.
Is this about them.
Did something happen while I was not looking.
Did I accidentally sign something I should not have.
None of it is reasonable. It comes in rapid succession.
But, It is simply the system trying to get ahead of whatever it thinks might be forming.
Meanwhile the person who sent the message is thinking about something painfully ordinary.
“Do you still have my charger.”
or
“Are we doing pasta.”
or
“I think your coat is still in my car.”
or
“Can you cover Saturday.”
And the body lets go again.
Breathing steadies.
You stand in the same place you were a moment ago, pretending you did not almost fall through the floor.
There is always that small instinct to glance around the room, as if someone might have witnessed the internal meltdown.
Only once the context lands does the truth show itself.
A brief misfire that disappears almost as quickly as it arrives.
A little bit foolish.
A quiet reset.
And within a few minutes the day is back into its usual shape, as if nothing happened.
KH Grade: A Behaviour
Sharp disruption.
High ambiguity.
Fast recovery.
KH Explanation
KH Thinks calls this the Premature Disaster Check. The system notices motion before it sees shape. A gap opens.
Until clarity arrives, the mind fills it with whatever unpleasant possibility it can build fastest.
Awareness: A message lands. Something is happening, but you cannot see the shape of it.
Coherence Check: The mind scans every drawer it can reach, searching for loose ends or mistakes.
Regulation: Breathing tightens. Muscles hold. Internal monitoring increases.
Implementation: The stomach drops. Scenarios appear before context does, all in the name of avoiding surprise.
Stabilisation: Clarity appears. The system resets. System returns to normal.
Not really fear and not a failure.
Just the nervous system stepping forward before the rest of you is ready, which would be fine if it did not insist on doing it with such confidence.
A brief misfire that disappears almost as quickly as it arrives.
Note
Header Photo by freestocks on Unsplash